But that is not what I want to write about today.
We've known for along time that Ryan would have about 2 weeks off around the holidays and wanted to take advantage of his time off. With the craziness of the holidays, we never got around to planning anything. We knew that we couldn't do anything extravagant- just because we have four kids. And trying to do anything with four kids can be a nightmare. Over the last two months we have learned that going to a park is about the extent of our sight seeing in Rome, and even that can prove difficult. One Saturday we tried to drive into Rome to a nice park called Tor Di Quinto. It is close to the big soccer stadium, and after we got stuck in traffic for 30 minutes, realized there was a game that day and cops were directing traffic away- and we couldn't even get to the park. So after an hour in the car, we stopped for gelato, went home and played in the backyard instead.
I've wanted to get out an explore Italy, and have put pressure on myself to do it. I just keep thinking, " We are only here for a short time and we need to go and do and experience it!". I got to see a lot of things on my 'Italy bucket list' this summer, but I still have some things that I would really like to do and see while we're here. I have come to realize that I am not going to be able to go and do everything, but a few things is reasonable, right?
So after the Christmas dust settled, we decided to just take a little trip to Lucca. It's a fairly small city, and not very touristy- so I thought that would be a good place to start. We decided to stay two nights and stop by Pisa on the way home.
I did a little research in my tourist books and Ryan started looking for accommodations. Hotels are hard because we have to get 2 adjoining rooms and that gets pricy. So we went the VRBO route. Found a cute house out of town - where the owner lives full time and rents out part of the house that has been turned into an apartment. We thought that would be great- out in real Tuscany , be in an apartment so we could all be together and then drive into Lucca.
Tuesday morning we packed up our little car with some snacks and a few backpacks and were on our way. We got to the VRBO about 2pm. We unpacked our stuff, went for a walk in the countryside and then decided to go get some food. We really didn't eat lunch in the car, so by 4pm everyone was getting hungry. Problem is, this is Italy and its is a real thing that everything closes from 1-4pm and dinner doesn't start until 8pm. We went to a little town and the little deli there didn't serve pizza until 6pm. I looked at trip advisor and found a pizza shop in Lucca that was open. We drove down there, found somewhere to park and walked to the pizza place. Life is good. Kids wolf down some pizza, everyone is full and happy and we head home.
Wednesday is where the lightbulb goes off in my head that this is not the glamorous European excursion I had built up in my mind.
Our host offered a homemade breakfast for $7 a person. I thought that was a bit pricey for my kids who eat a bowl of cereal (which I brought with us) but Ryan was trying to make it easy for me and bought the breakfast. After toast and yogurt, that $7 times 6 people starts to weigh on my mind. We just paid how much for that?! Then in my mind and I start adding up all the money this little excursion is starting to cost.
On to Lucca. It is a super cool city that is totally surrounded by a wall that was built in the 1500's. The wall is still completely intact and the city itself was never destroyed by war because of the wall. We rented bikes and rode all along the top
of the wall.
After an hour on the bikes, we stop at a park for a few minutes and decide to get lunch. We wanted something other than pizza so we find the most reasonably priced restaurant close by. After struggling to keep 4 kids contained and well behaved, we start realizing that any sight seeing with the little kids is nearly impossible. The kids barely eat their lunch- and when we finally finish, JR starts complaining that he's tired and wants to go home and take a nap. Since when does JR ask for a nap?!? Then Charly starts complaining that her legs are tired, even though she rode in a bike trailer the whole time. By this time, Ryan is done trying to make it work. So after 2 hours in Lucca, we decide to walk back to the car and go home. So much for wandering the streets of this old city and seeing all the old buildings. Before we left, I did make everyone stop to take a picture outside the walls, so we could remember this memorable trip. (insert sarcasm)
I very much wanted to post that picture on Instagram with some cute caption and witty hashtag about our fabulous family trip. I wanted to pretend that we had this wonderful experience touring Italy with the kids. But that would not be the whole truth. And I guess that is why I'm writing out this whole saga. It didn't seem right to post a 'perfect picture' representation of our day- I want to tell the whole story. And I'm not saying we didn't have fun. Kate and Clark really enjoyed riding the bikes and JR and Charly loved riding in the bike trailer and telling Ryan to ride faster and beat everyone. Ryan and I had some good discussions with Kate and Clark about the purpose of building walls of protection. We talked about Captain Moroni in the Book of Mormon and how he built walls to protect his people and how we build spiritual walls and put on the Armor of God to protect our spirits.
But it did not end up being this glamorous trip that I had built up in my mind. We spent a whole lot of money to ride bikes for an hour, and then sit in our VRBO while the kids drank hot chocolate and watched a movie on the iPad. Not to mention sleeping in a freezing apartment while the littles took turns waking up all night.
I guess I am realizing that we don't have to go anywhere to have the same experiences we can have at home. For years we never had the money to go on vacations. We went to my parents cabin for vacations because that was all we could afford. And during those years I have watched friends take their kids to the beach, Disneyland and all kinds of places all over the world - totally jealous of their vacations. And felt that I was missing out. That we were somehow deprived because we didn't go on fancy vacations. So when we moved to Italy, I guess I felt like it was my turn. My turn to go fancy places. My turn to take my kids to go and see the world. But the expensive lesson I have learned is that we are not extravagant vacationers. And I'm finally ok with it. I've learned that spending lots of money and going to fancy places is not what kids want- it's what I want. Building memories with the kids comes from simple time together. Whether that is at home or somewhere else. Going to the cabin is good enough. At least the kids can play, Ryan and I can relax and I don't have to stress that we just spent $80 on a lunch that no one enjoyed. I no longer need to be jealous, because that is no longer what I want.
I do have to add that on our way home from Lucca we stopped in Pisa to see the leaning tower and it was awesome! We parked, walked to the tower- walked around the Piazza and other buildings there, took some pictures, stopped by the pastecierria (pastry shop), got a snack for the kids and were on our way. It was a perfect way to end our trip- we got to see something super cool and it only took an hour.
Don't get me wrong, I feel very blessed to live here and have this experience. And yes, we get to go and do some very cool things. But I guess I just wanted to share this lesson that I have learned. One, I need to let go of this glamorous ideal of taking kids on vacations around Italy. We have LITTLE kids, and some things are just not possible with a 3 and 4 year old. Two, I need stop comparing myself to everyone else's "perfect" life. And three, I am ok that we are simple people who do simple things with our kids. We go to the park and a trip to the beach in the summer and we are good! That's what we are good at, whats comfortable, and what makes us happy.
We've known for along time that Ryan would have about 2 weeks off around the holidays and wanted to take advantage of his time off. With the craziness of the holidays, we never got around to planning anything. We knew that we couldn't do anything extravagant- just because we have four kids. And trying to do anything with four kids can be a nightmare. Over the last two months we have learned that going to a park is about the extent of our sight seeing in Rome, and even that can prove difficult. One Saturday we tried to drive into Rome to a nice park called Tor Di Quinto. It is close to the big soccer stadium, and after we got stuck in traffic for 30 minutes, realized there was a game that day and cops were directing traffic away- and we couldn't even get to the park. So after an hour in the car, we stopped for gelato, went home and played in the backyard instead.
I've wanted to get out an explore Italy, and have put pressure on myself to do it. I just keep thinking, " We are only here for a short time and we need to go and do and experience it!". I got to see a lot of things on my 'Italy bucket list' this summer, but I still have some things that I would really like to do and see while we're here. I have come to realize that I am not going to be able to go and do everything, but a few things is reasonable, right?
So after the Christmas dust settled, we decided to just take a little trip to Lucca. It's a fairly small city, and not very touristy- so I thought that would be a good place to start. We decided to stay two nights and stop by Pisa on the way home.
I did a little research in my tourist books and Ryan started looking for accommodations. Hotels are hard because we have to get 2 adjoining rooms and that gets pricy. So we went the VRBO route. Found a cute house out of town - where the owner lives full time and rents out part of the house that has been turned into an apartment. We thought that would be great- out in real Tuscany , be in an apartment so we could all be together and then drive into Lucca.
Tuesday morning we packed up our little car with some snacks and a few backpacks and were on our way. We got to the VRBO about 2pm. We unpacked our stuff, went for a walk in the countryside and then decided to go get some food. We really didn't eat lunch in the car, so by 4pm everyone was getting hungry. Problem is, this is Italy and its is a real thing that everything closes from 1-4pm and dinner doesn't start until 8pm. We went to a little town and the little deli there didn't serve pizza until 6pm. I looked at trip advisor and found a pizza shop in Lucca that was open. We drove down there, found somewhere to park and walked to the pizza place. Life is good. Kids wolf down some pizza, everyone is full and happy and we head home.Wednesday is where the lightbulb goes off in my head that this is not the glamorous European excursion I had built up in my mind.
Our host offered a homemade breakfast for $7 a person. I thought that was a bit pricey for my kids who eat a bowl of cereal (which I brought with us) but Ryan was trying to make it easy for me and bought the breakfast. After toast and yogurt, that $7 times 6 people starts to weigh on my mind. We just paid how much for that?! Then in my mind and I start adding up all the money this little excursion is starting to cost.
of the wall.After an hour on the bikes, we stop at a park for a few minutes and decide to get lunch. We wanted something other than pizza so we find the most reasonably priced restaurant close by. After struggling to keep 4 kids contained and well behaved, we start realizing that any sight seeing with the little kids is nearly impossible. The kids barely eat their lunch- and when we finally finish, JR starts complaining that he's tired and wants to go home and take a nap. Since when does JR ask for a nap?!? Then Charly starts complaining that her legs are tired, even though she rode in a bike trailer the whole time. By this time, Ryan is done trying to make it work. So after 2 hours in Lucca, we decide to walk back to the car and go home. So much for wandering the streets of this old city and seeing all the old buildings. Before we left, I did make everyone stop to take a picture outside the walls, so we could remember this memorable trip. (insert sarcasm)
I very much wanted to post that picture on Instagram with some cute caption and witty hashtag about our fabulous family trip. I wanted to pretend that we had this wonderful experience touring Italy with the kids. But that would not be the whole truth. And I guess that is why I'm writing out this whole saga. It didn't seem right to post a 'perfect picture' representation of our day- I want to tell the whole story. And I'm not saying we didn't have fun. Kate and Clark really enjoyed riding the bikes and JR and Charly loved riding in the bike trailer and telling Ryan to ride faster and beat everyone. Ryan and I had some good discussions with Kate and Clark about the purpose of building walls of protection. We talked about Captain Moroni in the Book of Mormon and how he built walls to protect his people and how we build spiritual walls and put on the Armor of God to protect our spirits.
I guess I am realizing that we don't have to go anywhere to have the same experiences we can have at home. For years we never had the money to go on vacations. We went to my parents cabin for vacations because that was all we could afford. And during those years I have watched friends take their kids to the beach, Disneyland and all kinds of places all over the world - totally jealous of their vacations. And felt that I was missing out. That we were somehow deprived because we didn't go on fancy vacations. So when we moved to Italy, I guess I felt like it was my turn. My turn to go fancy places. My turn to take my kids to go and see the world. But the expensive lesson I have learned is that we are not extravagant vacationers. And I'm finally ok with it. I've learned that spending lots of money and going to fancy places is not what kids want- it's what I want. Building memories with the kids comes from simple time together. Whether that is at home or somewhere else. Going to the cabin is good enough. At least the kids can play, Ryan and I can relax and I don't have to stress that we just spent $80 on a lunch that no one enjoyed. I no longer need to be jealous, because that is no longer what I want.
Don't get me wrong, I feel very blessed to live here and have this experience. And yes, we get to go and do some very cool things. But I guess I just wanted to share this lesson that I have learned. One, I need to let go of this glamorous ideal of taking kids on vacations around Italy. We have LITTLE kids, and some things are just not possible with a 3 and 4 year old. Two, I need stop comparing myself to everyone else's "perfect" life. And three, I am ok that we are simple people who do simple things with our kids. We go to the park and a trip to the beach in the summer and we are good! That's what we are good at, whats comfortable, and what makes us happy.
