I Choose Sunshine

Over the last few weeks I have had cause to reflect on my attitude about my circumstances and life in general. It seems that I have spent too much energy focusing on the hard, dramatic and negative events in my life. I do not consider myself a pessimist, but it seems that my honesty about my frustrations has led me to focus on them. In talking to my amazing friends about this, they shared this quote with me from President Gordon B. Hinkley, " Stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight. I am suggesting that as we go through life, we accentuate the positive" This quote has sunk deep into my heart. We all have our fair share of storms, and in my attempt to document my life in Italy, I'm afraid I may have been seeking the storms. It is easy to write about the storms, and over the last few months, it seems like there have been quite a few. But there has also been sunshine. Lots of it. I want to be an optimist. I don't want everything I say and write about to be negative. I want to see all the good things that happen, and the positive effects from those hard, frustrating things that happen. Don't worry - I will still be honest. I will still tell it like it is, but I want to make sure that I document not only the hard, but the happy. After returning to the U.S. I have realized how much I love living in Italy. It is home. I would not trade my experience living there for anything. In fact, I felt it was all I could talk about with my friends and family. I love the things I have learned. I have enjoyed seeing a different culture and embracing it. The way I see it - moving to Italy has been like the first year of marriage. We all know it takes a while to find a balance in our marriage - each person brings to marriage their own ideas of how things are 'supposed to be. Some things that are the 'right way' to us, are the wrong way to our spouse. We have to give and take. We see that maybe there is a better way of doing things. Maybe our spouses' perspective is be better than ours. But all of this takes time. There can be lots of frustration as we learn how adjust. But in the end, the 'my way' turns into 'our' way. And so it is with me and Italy. I have definitely experienced a learning curve for living in Italy. At first, there were so many things that were different and hard. But as I have learned, it has become easier - and things that were so different - are now normal. I have had to learn to adjust, to change, and , lets be honest- change is hard! And I have had no reservations in telling you all about it! So I have decided, that for me, I want to more fully enjoy the sunlight. I want to enjoy the Sunday afternoons playing Monopoly Jr. with the kids. I want to focus on the fact that I know I have made friendships that will last a lifetime. I have learned that having less is really having more. I love the things that my children are learning from all this. I love that my relationship with my husband and my Heavenly Father have been strengthened. I love that we are closer as a family than we ever have been and that Ryan and I are learning to be better parents. And I love Italy. I love the crazy way they drive. I love the beautiful green countryside. I love that we get weird looks when we ask for ice at restaurants. I love the rows and rows of 'biscotti' (cookies) at the grocery store. And probably most of all - I love the produce, especially the tomatoes. There are still things that I love more about the U.S. and the way things are there, but I can appreciate the differences. I will forever love and miss Texas Roadhouse, corn tortilllas, garbage disposals, on-line bill pay, natural peanut butter and York peppermint patties. But for now, I am seeking the sunshine. I am choosing to see the good and focus on it.